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Let Them Know They Are Loved: Julie's Faith Journey- Part 5
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Let Them Know They Are Loved: Julie's Faith Journey- Part 5

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Hi friends! On today’s Draw Near to Me episode we will be diving into part 5 of Julie’s faith journey.  For those who prefer to read, today’s content is also posted down below.  There were so many things that struck me about this part of her story.  One of them is the reminder that we can often have a vision of how we believe God is going to work and move, and this can be harmful if we remain rigid to how we believe it should be done.  On mission, Julie will often give out these little bendable figurines to remind us that we all need to remain flexible because things will often deviate from our plan.  This resonates.  Being flexible to how God calls us and letting go of the “control” of making things happen a certain way often opens new possibilities and a better path.  Enjoy!   


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Costa Rica was an adventure.  We rented a house with Larry and Cheryl, lived off our savings, and had the time of our life.  We moved most of our family there except for our oldest daughter.  She was heading into her freshman year of high school.  To avoid disrupting her education, she stayed in the U.S. with her dad. 

In Costa Rica I had to learn how to homeschool, but I had no idea how to do it.  Back then, there were limited resources and very few people did it.  Somehow, we navigated through the process.  There were some sweet memories that came with it.  My younger daughter, Rachel, and I pretended that a school bus came to pick her up every day.  We made a locker out of a laundry basket and even had a class pet, which was a lizard that she had caught.  She did really well.   

Together, with Larry and Cheryl, we began building up the FSM mission site in Costa Rica.  It was strategically located steps away from an impoverished area, Bajo Tejares, to serve that community.  The mission was going to have a tutoring program for kids, a church, a parsonage, a mission center, classrooms with computers, and playgrounds.  While we were constructing FSM, we were also trying to determine where Manos de Fe, the second ministry, was going to be located. 

Our original plan was to start an orphanage in Guatemala.  We wanted to give back to the country where we got Daniel.  Gary went on scouting expeditions, but the land was expensive, we did not know anybody there, and those we met were looking to see how they could take advantage of us.  Things were not working.

At the time, it was also unsafe to live in Guatemala.  Americans and Europeans were being kidnapped and held for ransom, and it was not uncommon for children to go missing.  Doors kept slamming in our faces.  It was depressing.  We came to grips with the reality that Guatemala was not the place we could start an orphanage. 

We finally reached out to our old friend, a pastor at a church in Panama, that we met on our first ever mission trip.  Panama still held a special place in our hearts.  We called and explained that we knew God was leading us to build an orphanage.  Initially we thought it was supposed to be in Guatemala, but it did not seem right.  We had been praying and wondering if there was any chance that it was Panama where God wanted us to go.  Our pastor friend then said, “Oh my goodness Julie, we just finished a weeklong prayer vigil of how we can reach out to the indigenous people here in Panama.  You literally called the day after we ended this weeklong prayer.”

It was an amazing God story.  While the Guatemala piece felt really dark, our first step toward establishing something in Panama was the opposite.  It felt like God was in it.  When we met with the Panamanian government, they confirmed that they wanted us to come.  The orphanages were overcrowded and the indigenous needed so much help.  We were told we were greatly needed there, and this would be an answer to prayer.  We could tell that God was all over it. 

It was decided.  Manos de Fe would be established in Panama.

After being in Costa Rica for about 7 to 8 months, we began looking at our next step.  We thought about moving to Panama right out of Costa Rica, but I was really missing my oldest daughter.  I had been flying home as much as possible so I would not miss out on being present in her life.  I talked all the time with her, but it was not the same as being there.  Although she was happy with her dad and in high school, I needed to be around my baby girl.  I missed her so much. 

We knew God was directing us to start Manos de Fe in Panama, but we were not sure what our next move should be.  I struggled with the thought of staying away from my oldest daughter any longer.  I did not feel like I could do it.  On top of that, Gary was unable to access medication he needed for his health condition.  He had been toughing it out and living without it in Costa Rica, but it was time for him to get back on his medication.  Although we did not have jobs to go back to, we started toying with the idea of returning to the States to regroup. 

We began to pray about whether to move to the U.S. or Panama.  We had already gone as far as buying land for the mission site, putting a deposit down on a rental house in Panama, and trying to find a bilingual school for our younger daughter.  However, something still did not feel right. 

A few days into praying about where God wanted us, Gary received an email from his old job out of the blue.  It was the company he had quit for us to come down to Costa Rica.  After checking in to see how Gary was doing, his former boss asked if he would consider coming back to work for them.  He was told that his replacement was not a good fit, and they could use his help.  They offered Gary his old job with a raise, so we moved to Florida.   Again, God was in all the little pieces.

When we got back, we began to question whether we were supposed to be in Panama instead building this orphanage.  We kind of felt like failures.  We had the Costa Rica piece, FSM, going but not the Panama piece.  We felt deflated.  We had these grandiose dreams and visions, but our expectation of the timing in which they occurred were perhaps ours and not God’s.      

We started seeking counsel and advice from people firm in the faith.  One friend, Jean, firmly told Gary that she did not see what was wrong with us being back in the U.S.  She said, “God told you to do something.  You did it.  You stepped out in faith.  You did what He called you to do and now He said OK, good job, now it is time to come home.” 

In the moments where the feelings of failure would plague us, our friends rallied around us.   They said, “What are you talking about?  You’re going to have an orphanage!  Let’s go.  Let’s send teams.”  That encouragement helped us to keep going.

Manos de Fe was not initially created as a place to do mission trips.  Gary and I were just trying to walk out the things God had planted in our hearts to do since we were little kids.  But in 2009, when Beach United Methodist Church wanted to organize a trip to Manos de Fe, we realized we had an opportunity to share the joy of being on mission.  We had previously taken a group of our friends down to Panama, but this was the first time we had organized something with a church.  

By allowing others to go on short term mission to Manos de Fe, we could share what we had experienced with others.  We knew the joy of doing what God calls you to do and what it was like to be a part of loving on the indigenous people.  They were considered the lowest rung on the socioeconomic ladder and were looked down on.  There was an overflow of joy that came from letting others feel loved and extending the love of Christ.  Being a part of seeing people restored and redeemed was incredible.  For Gary and I, being on mission made our marriage better, it put the things that mattered into focus, and the joy and happiness of serving other people was heightened there and when we returned.  Why wouldn’t we want to share that with people?

Over time more and more mission teams wanted to come and help us build Manos de Fe.  However, we still had a problem.  Our original desire was to start an orphanage to help those in need, but we still had not received a single orphan.

To be continued.

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Introductory music credits:

Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!): https://uppbeat.io/t/andrey-rossi/seize-the-day License code: 3UJXMZRISUKLJNSB

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